The coronavirus pandemic has, without a doubt, affected us all. We are all facing uncertainty. Will there be enough toilet roll at the supermarket? Is my job safe? How will my kids cope with studying from home? Can I say goodbye to my Covid-positive husband in the ICU?
I wanted to understand the impact this pandemic has had on people's lives, so I put posts out on Reddit and my Facebook page asking for people's stories. I was overwhelmed by the responses. Friends and family around the country responded, as did strangers from both the UK and the USA. Some people have lost loved ones, found themselves in financial difficulty, or battled with the virus themselves. Others have discovered a sense of peace or purpose, grown closer to their families, or been supported by their workplace. What's important is that these people's stories be heard. Together we can support each other and grow as a community. We can mourn together and rejoice together. We need to start having conversations.
Personal
Isolation is more than an inconvenience for me. As an extremely vulnerable person I am only allowed to get fresh air through the window and I’m not allowed out for the hours exercise a day or even to sit in the garden.
It means I am feeling lonely, no one else in the family understands as they are able to go outside and see nature and get proper fresh air. We live on a farm and I’m not allowed to join the others in the family to go tend to the animals. I can’t take my dogs for a walk with my husband which is what I do daily.
Being autistic means this change is unbearable, I am having more meltdowns as everyone is home so there is more noise, the day is unpredictable so I don’t know how to cope. This means I am involuntarily self-harming and stimming much more. I have had to pay for some private online counselling to try and get some support.
Isolation is looking through a window and seeing the life outside that I can’t be a part of with tears rolling down my face. There are people around me physically but I have never felt so alone. They don’t understand the challenges I face daily, my routine has been disrupted which make me extremely anxious. The thought of not knowing when this will end and life can go back to normal is too overwhelming. I have been told to just reach out and talk to people but this is very challenging for someone with autism. Part of the challenge is having to spend time with people which I don’t ever do. I’m unable to get space physically from everyone else and there is no privacy. I’m not able to have space to unwind and decompress from the day meaning I am having bad meltdowns more than normal.
There are a few things I am looking forward to when this all ends. Mainly that my routine will go back to normal, I will have time and space to decompress and I won’t be having the meltdowns that I am having now. I will be able to go out and enjoy the nature again rather than just out of the window and imagine what everything looks like.
After 2 weeks I realised I was doing the same thing day in day out as I'm unemployed at the moment, so I read a book called Ikigai which is about finding your reason to get up each day. This led me to read a book on Buddhism. I've completely started to change how I live - going for early morning walks every day, eating less, and spending less time on a screen. I've been lucky so far in that no one I know has had Covid-19, but in a strange way the pandemic has helped me become a better, more caring person.
I think I’ve had the virus. I developed a cough and temperature on literally the last day of school before we closed. The cough only lingered for about 24 hours and the temperature for two days. I spent about five days in bed with the worst headache I’ve ever had (and that still comes and goes). My ribs and back felt like they were going to explode out of me and even getting up to eat something was exhausting. I had a good week or so of feeling like I couldn’t quite fill my lungs but my wonderful first-aider-husband kept an eye on my colour and general state of being. It’s three weeks now and I’m still not 100% right. I’ve got my sense of smell and taste back - that took ten days. But there is still an odd burning in my nose and I have occasional night sweats that are a very new thing for me. I’m still snotty and feel tired easily. The trickiest thing was getting good medical advice. 111 have an automated message that instructs you to hold only if you feel you are really struggling and it’s an emergency. My GP surgery wouldn’t talk to me as they direct any Covid-19 issues to 111. I worry that some people would endure the symptoms of walking pneumonia without getting any guidance - just an observation really. I know that the NHS is doing all that it can.
As a pregnant lady in my final trimester I have been 'shielding' at home for 6 weeks now. I've only been out for walks in the fields around my home and I've visited the midwife twice. Other than that I've only seen my husband, 5 year old son & 2 cats! At first I was angry and I still feel a certain sense of injustice that I couldn't finish work on my terms (I didn't even get to say goodbye to my colleagues or any of the kids) and then I got super emotional about all the things we would miss out on - shopping trips for baby, my son's first school trip, family gatherings for birthdays, our holiday, antenatal classes, even my son's swimming and football classes! Ultimately I've realised I am very lucky to be safe at home with my 2 favourite people in the whole world.
There are still lots of things which set off my anxiety and some evenings I just want to cry. Lots of that surrounds birth and what it will be like in the hospital, will they let my husband stay with me, will the midwife be wearing a face mask, will I be able to get home as soon as possible, will I get the same care as last time? These are all questions I can't seem to get answers to and it plays on your mind. I feel even worse for my friend who is 7 months through her first pregnancy.
I am also worried about what it will be like once I've had the baby. If things haven't changed how long will it be before we can share our new arrival with family and friends? Will I be able to get all the things we need for a newborn? What support will be available from the health visitor taking social distancing into consideration?
All we can really do is wait and see, which is tough when you like to plan as much as me.
Still, I have been trying lots of positive things to take my mind off these worries. Firstly, we have a social routine as a household - there is a different event on every evening e.g. a quiz with my choir on Monday, Saturday night family dinner on Zoom, 'takeaway' and film night on Friday. Everyday I post a positive part of my day on Instagram and Facebook. Its mostly for me so I reflect on everything that has been good about the day but an unexpected positive has been the comments from people I haven't connected with in a while. I bought myself a sewing machine and have been trying to up-cycle some old fabric we found in the airing cupboard (some projects are more successful than others!) I do this in the late evening when my mind can wander to negative things. The most helpful thing has been spending unexpected bonus time with my boys and being able to do all those things we say we're going to do but never get round to because - hey, there is nothing stopping us now! We've made real doughnuts, bread and other delicious things from scratch, had a family splash out, started growing veggies from seeds, done a new craft project everyday, had a teddy bears' picnic and made s'mores on a BBQ. This time must be very strange and difficult for my son but hopefully we are doing our best to make sure he remembers more good stuff than bad. If we manage that then I'll be happy.
I have not had to deal directly with Covid-19, fortunately, but am pretty heavily affected indirectly.
I moved across the country right before it really picked up in the US. It was a 42 hour drive from the East Coast of the US to the West coast, and we planned to do it over about a week. When we left, the novel coronavirus was limited to only a handful of cases outside of China, and only a vague threat. We had ended our lease on our apartment on the East coast, so staying was not really an option anyway, but we didn't really even think that there might be problems with moving. By the time we got to the West Coast, pretty much the entire US was now in self-imposed quarantine. We wound up effectively isolated in our car for the trip, so we were not worried about exposure or anything, but we had not anticipated certain problems. Our car was completely packed, so we had left out stuff that seemed obviously easy to get once we had moved into the new place. On the second day in the new city, we were still living in a hotel temporarily, but I spent 6 hours going around to every store I could think of to try to find toilet paper because every store was out. We had moved for job opportunities, with my partner having a good job offer, while I expected to be relatively easily able to do some live music once here to not be a complete freeloader. Instead, we both have no income now, and are having to pull from savings. Also, I have been living here for 2 months and have not even met my neighbours or made any friends since I am inside all day. The loneliness and financial uncertainty have made it an exceptionally stressful move.
I live in the USA. I have been working from home full time for a few years now, so isolation I am used to (sadly). However, my husband lost his job, so I have someone at home during the quarantine which has actually helped me cope with everything going on. I am not "essential" but I am a government worker so I am working during all of this. I'm keeping up with friends, texting, being active online, and creating game servers so that we can delve into other things to think about. I'm trying to do what I can (money and future are uncertain), and helping where I can (giving away game codes for folks stuck at home). I have also tried to help others by posting recipes, helping with game suggestions or cooking suggestions (replacements for ingredients folks don't have to make full meals etc.) and also sometimes just being an ear for folks to talk to and have someone listen to them.
We were potentially exposed almost a month ago, and while unable to get tested, neither of us contracted Covid. Mental health wise, I find myself obsessing over the deaths, politics, and just going down a rabbit hole to get more information. Did you know it was actually a virus that started with bats?
My dad, however, I have been super worried about since he started working again (after knee surgery) right after all this started getting serious at the beginning of March. He works in retail and is considered essential. His big relief or mental help is being able to go ride his motorcycle for hours in no particular direction.
I am used to isolation. I don't think a lot of folks were. Finding a hobby and keeping a routine is important, and hopefully folks can do that.
One day I woke up
Then I sat around
Then bed time
This weekend I will mostly be doing the same
Family
My 89 yr old Mum has been self-isolating in her own home. She has had so many many offers of help, food parcels left in the porch, and offers to walk the dog. She's learned new internet skills too... via video messaging we've taught her how to send photos to family online, and how to get YouTube on the TV so she can watch the operas and musicals being screened. She has stretched herself to manage and she has, but 3 weeks in, she tripped and fell - face first while walking the dog. An astonishing number of passers-by stopped to phone for the ambulance and check she was still breathing - no fuss about social distancing - and I can't thank them enough. Someone even took the dog home when the ambulance men came less than 20 minutes later. Off to A&E - x-rays, brain scan, blood tests - all sorted in under 4 hours. I couldn't fault the staff in A&E, they were marvellous. She is now staying with us in our home for the foreseeable for monitoring, TLC and dog duties! Today, two nurses came to our home to check on Mum's wound dressings - all gloved and masked up - like the old days with the district nurse!
My wife's mum has died due to Covid-19. Also her dad is in hospital with the virus. Arranging anything has been difficult as everything has to be done by phone or electronic medium. Also due to travel restrictions we have not yet managed to access the house to obtain their wills etc.
Her dad has now also died from the virus - they passed less than a week apart. The family is heartbroken.
Work
You know we first heard of this, what January/ February time? Our first resident became ill with what we now are certain were the symptoms in late February, and a staff member came back from California at the end of February with what we thought was a horrid cold. He was very ill and sweating the next day and he went home. The next day he went to A&E. He said he was tested and it came back negative, although I don't believe that. He had 7 days off. Anyway, our resident became ill and died on the 29th of February, but as the UK didn't have many cases, it was left. A couple of days later another resident died very quickly. A week or two later a resident went into hospital, tested positive, and died the next day. Obviously the staff were very scared but we had to continue (with aprons and gloves only). A week later another resident was ill and taken in. She was tested positive and died the next day. That same day, another resident went in and tested positive - happily, he has recovered and is back at home. I became unwell last Monday. I was not myself, my temperature was up from normal, I had a very bad headache and sore throat. I was advised to stay home for 7 days. I felt rough and very tired for 2 or 3 days, then started feeling better. I was worried all the time in case I went to sleep and didn't wake up. I'm back at work now, and a few staff are off with illness. I still feel anxious about working - we cannot distance from residents and they are lonely having not seen family for weeks - we are their family. I still give them a hug and reassurance because it's my job. I still worry that perhaps I didn't have it and will get it. My daughters and sister are supportive via text. I have to support the staff who are all scared and unsure of things. Staff still don't have masks. What a sad situation.
My school were amazing. The week before schools closed, the head rang me on the Sunday morning and told me he was worried because of my transplant and to not come in. The director of education delivered everything to my house that I needed and I haven't been put on the rota. Working from home is strange, I miss the students and want to reach out to some of them, but can't just get in touch to see if they're OK. Isolation has brought us closer as a family, I'm really enjoying the extra time together.
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